Cleaning the House

1. Sweep or vacuum obvious bits from floor.

2. Take all small rugs and shake them on the terrace. Leave them there until the end of your session.

3. Change bed linen.

4. Fill mop bucket (half) with hot water, Don Limpio, and a drop of bleach from yellow bottle.

5. Mop everywhere, but strategically so that you're not stepping on areas already done. Use the hallway as an oasis.

Follow these housewifely tips for the best results.

• Change water when it gets dirty or you're just spreading dirt
• Empty water down toilet not kitchen sink. Sink will get blocked with sludge and bits.
• Wash mop and let it dry upside-down in cupboard on terrace.
• Spray with anti-vermin stuff as you'll have mopped most of it up.

6. Vacuum all big rugs and possibly settees with nozzle (on kitchen shelf).

7. Dust wooden furniture with Pledge and a J-Cloth or some kitchen paper. Lightly dust TV screen.

8. Clean bath, sink and toilet with special cloth and Don Limpio.

9. Wipe rim of toilet daily with toilet paper and put drop of bleach down toilet.

10. Clean mirror with Crystale glass cleaner.Clean kettle with same.

11. Put rugs back, and wipe all kitchen surfaces with Don Limpio.

12. Sweep then hose down terrace.

13. Sit back and admire your lovely house.

NB Maintenance

Put J-Cloth in with washing or in dishwasher at top or in bowl with drop of bleach every three days or so.

Wash towels and tea-towels and table linen frequently.

Use swifter to keep dust down off floors.

Washing machine

Start of programme is 'F'

Spin is 'H' - I give an extra spin usually.

Use one tablet for a half load, or two tablets for a big wash.

Dishwasher

Use one pellet. They're under the sink.

A1 is the normal programme starter - look at the icons on the inside of the door for further enlightenment.

Take care that nothing sticks up so that the arm can't swivel. Lay the long utensils horizontally across top layer.

Don't put wooden stuff on bottom layer.

Put everything upside down. It won't wash the bottom of things well.